April is Sexual Assault Awareness and Child Abuse Prevention month. Community VOICES has successfully advocated for stronger laws to protect and our combined experience and commitment to this cause has earned us the respect of many, but the laws we've advocated for are only as good as enforcement. The statistics tell us that offenders have multiple victims before they are "caught" which makes the need for educating children BEFORE they become victims crucial. It's our responsibility as parents to educate our children, don't wait for someone else to have a conversation with your child because that someone just may be a sex offender.
Below is the content from the Community VOICES "Community Conversation" presentation, and our Predator ID Kit. www.communityvoices.net
TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS!
Who is the "Typical" Child Molester
I am probably well known and liked by you and your child.
I can be a man or woman, married or single.
I can be a child, adolescent, or adult.
I can be of any race, hold any religious belief, and have any sexual preference.
I can be a parent, step-parent, relative, family friend, teacher, clergyman, babysitter, or anyone who comes into contact with children.
I am most likely a stable, employed, respected member of the community.
My education and my intelligence don't prevent me from molesting your child.
I can be anybody.
Advice from a Child molester...
It is very easy to gain access to your child.
I pay attention to your child and make them feel special.
I present the appearance of being someone you and your family can trust and rely on.
I get to know your child's likes and dislikes very well.
I go out of the way to buy gifts or treats your child will like.
I isolate your child by involving them in fun activities so we can be together - alone.
If you are a single parent, I may prey on your fears about your child lacking a father figure or stable home life.
If my career involves working with children, I may choose to spend my free time helping children or taking them on "special outings" by myself.
I take advantage of your child's natural curiosity about sex by telling them "dirty" jokes, showing them pornography, and playing sexual games.
I will probably know more about what kids like than you do; i.e. music, clothing, video games, etc.
I make comments like "Anyone who molests a child should be shot!" or "Sexually abusing kids is the sickest thing anyone can do."
If I am a parent, it is even easier for me to isolate, control and molest my own children. I can sexually abuse my children without my wife ever suspecting a thing. I gradually block the communication between my children and their mother and make it look like I am the "good guy".
PREVENTION
ADVICE FROM SEX OFFENDERS
Don't feel that your child is safe from me! At least one out of every four children will be molested by the age of eighteen. Here are some ways to protect children from me.
Don't expect your child to be able to protect themselves from me or assume that they will be able to tell you that I am abusing them.
Communication: listen, believe and trust what your child tells you. Children rarely lie about sexual abuse.
Education: teach your child healthy values about sexuality. If you don't teach your child....I WILL.
Watch for any symptoms of sexual abuse your child might demonstrate.
Give your child specific information about where on their body they should not be touched or touch others.
Let them know that people who touch children's private parts need help because they have a problem with touching.
Remind your child that "secret touching" is never the child's fault. Talk to your child about the ways someone might try to "trick" them into going along with the "secret touching" or not telling you that it is happening to them.
Make sure your child knows that you want them to tell you immediately if something should happen and that, despite what anyone else may tell them, they will not be in trouble.
Get to know your child's friends and the homes in which your child plays.
Be wary of older children or adults who want to spend a lot of time alone with your child.
Trust your intuition: if you feel something is not right in your child's relationships, act on it.
Learn about the prevention program that your school uses and discuss it with your children. Have "safety talks" with your children several times a year. Add information about the risk of encountering sexually explicit materials and adult offenders in the community and on the Internet.
Almost one quarter of children are exposed to "unwanted" pornography via the Internet. Use an ISP that offers screening for obscenity and pornography.
Parents can defeat me if the work together.
Educate yourself, your family and your community.
Anonynimty is a sex offenders best weapon, know who the offenders are in your neighborhood by visiting http://www.nsopw.gov/Core/Conditions.aspx . Sex offenders are often "well liked" members of the community, this enables them to weave their way into our families, schools and children's lives. Pay attention and trust your instincts and EDUCATE yourself and your children. There is no better advocate for your child than you.
~Laurie Myers, President of Community VOICES~
(C) Community VOICES
The content above not written by VOICES is being used with the permission permission from the author.
Thank you to Cory Jewell Jensen.
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